Month: December 2021

Our Family Story Chapter 4

Leave a comment

The burial took place in the little village by the little adobe church. The sun peeked behind grey clouds surrounded by the grey sky looking down upon the grey ground. The cross on the top of the church still gleamed. The family surrounded the homemade coffin made of pinon tree. The priest gave the blessing and handed the blessed crucifix to Mama who was still crying. Ofelia and the other siblings placed a special object on top of the coffin. Ofelia chose a toy truck. They use to play together on their free time with that little blue truck, pretending to drive to town and buy as much candy as they wanted.

Papa and the other men began to fill the hole with their shovels when the coffin was lowered deep in the ground. Soon, the entire coffin was covered with rich desert dirt. And now the only reminder of little Juanito was a big lump of dirt, a cross head stone, and some flowers. Everyone comforting each other that Juanito had gone to a better place.

 Ofelia cried herself to sleep that night wondering if her heart would ever heal from the pain of her family’s grief. To think that she would experience many more heart aches as her journey continues, as this was only the beginning. 

Living without Juanito left the family empty. Papa would not talk about him, and he seemed to drink a little more beer than usual. Mama seemed a little less herself, a little more serious, a little more protective.

Down the road Polo, the baby of the family, spots someone walking down the road.  It was Tia Maria. “Mama!! Tia Maria! She is here!” yelled Polo. ,

 Mama greeted her at the door.  “Maria! It is good to see you!”  They embraced for a bit. 

“Hola Eolojia! Come estas?” asked Maria. 

“Oye, muy triste…so depressed. It’s been a hard few weeks,” as tears welled up in her eyes.

“Si, well I am here now.” They walked towards the kitchen. 

For dinner Mama and Tia Maria made a huge dinner for everyone. Papa butchered a lamb and Tia Maria brought fresh oranges and baked a chocolate cake, Mama baked rolls and churned homemade butter. 

As the family sat to eat, everything started to feel better, and hope began to grow. They talked and exchanged stories, and the kids running around with laughter once again. 

Our Family Story Chapter 3

Leave a comment

“Ohhh!” Ofelia wakes up to the sound of groaning. Juanito was in bed crying in pain. Mama was patting a cold cloth on his forehead. “He’s burning up!”  

“What’s wrong with him?” asks Ofelia scared. 

“It seems that he has broken his hip.” Mama sighs. 

“Will he be able to walk again?” 

“We need to take him to the doctor, but the only doctor lives in Taos.” There was a long eerie silence. “We don’t have any money to pay the doctor anyway.” Mama’s voice was starting to shake, her lower lip quivering. 

“Comm’on hita, lets make breakfast. and pray for your hermano.” 

That day Mama stayed by Juanito’s side, trying to get him to eat and drink, but the pain would not settle. The fever would not break. Ofelia was in charge of prepping and cooking the family meals while Mama tended to her baby boy. While working Ofelia whispered prayers for God to heal her little brother.

Each day he seemed to get a little worse. Juanito was not recovering and Mama was exhausted. She stayed up as much as she could to tend to him. 

That night Ofelia was praying extra hard, and lit extra candles of the Virgin. She prayed to the Mother of God that He would exchange her life for her brother’s. She begged and she pleaded. When she slowly walked to the bed side of Juanito she saw her Mama leaned over his body, crying. Papa had is hand on her back and his head bowed, tears dropping to the wooden floor. The moon light shone through the window and the candles that were lit on the alter enlarged the shadows of her parents.

 Ofelia’s heart stopped, she felt small and the shadows on the wall seem to enclose around her. “No!” she whispered. She squinted trying to keep the tears from coming, to cry meant to accept the reality of her brother’s death. If she could keep from crying, maybe it would be a bad dream. Her throat could not hold it in anymore. The lump jumped out and she fell to her knees. The tears did come, and her brother was dead. 

BE KIND

Leave a comment

Promoting kindness seems everywhere these days. I see it on bumper stickers, posters, FB and Instagram posts and most certainly in schools. I even have a poster that says “Be Kind” on my door in my classroom.

Sometimes I get very cynical with the notion. Don’t get me wrong, I whole heartedly believe that we should be kind. Maybe it’s the way the message is being conveyed that makes me chuckle in disbelief- “Be kind? Us? Ha!” First of all, how bossy are those bumper stickers? Second of all, nobody tells me what to do! I’ll be kind when I want to be kind, and only when it benefits me!

I can’t be the only one who feels this way, right?

In reality though, what does it really mean to be kind, because I personally believe that being kind is one of the hardest things to do. It’s like asking me to like cilantro. NO THANKS!

Be kind to the person who cuts me off while driving? NOPE!

Be kind to the person who is rude to me at the store? DON’T THINK SO!

Be kind to the person who insults me in an email? YEAH RIGHT!

I’ll be kind to the person who strokes my ego, lifts up my wounded heart, and agrees with me about my politics and values, thank you very much!

See, kindness does exist, but it only exists tribally! You see, the root word for kindness is kin and kind, in other words, kindness is what I extend to my kin. So I’ve been wondering- is it really kindness when I only extend it to my kin, to those who are like me? In my own experience, that is where kindness ends.

So how do we promote kindness when we really don’t know how to do it?

I think a lot of us are trying, but it certainly isn’t easy. It’s something that takes up a lot of conscious effort and humility to really be kind to someone who is so different from us, and especially to someone who has been unkind to us.

I remember reading once, “Do not be concerned with how others treat you, rather be concerned about how YOU treat others.” In reality we live the opposite way- and so we have a lot of unkind people in the world.

So maybe promoting kindness has more to do with ourselves and how we treat others, and in all of this, the first and most important person to be kind to is ourselves! After all, practice is what makes this doable, and progress not perfection, is what the goal should be.

I’ll still probably cuss the person out who cuts me off of traffic, because nothing pisses me off more, but I want to be more aware of my interactions with others and do my best to be kind, because what the world needs right now, more than ever, is kindness!

Love Always